Swedish for Wait, What!?

[mystrana]

Author: yamyamyam
Artists: Mystrana, Histoires Éternelles
Rating: E
No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationship: Clint/Bucky (WinterHawk)
Words: 15096
Tags: Human Disaster Clint Barton, idiots to lovers, Disrespecting IKEA, Natasha is a troll, stolen macaroni, Sweden is nice this time of year, ball pit shark, Reindeer, just to mix it up a bit on the ungulate front, there's sex too it isn't as much of a petting zoo fic as the tags imply, ASL, Anal Sex, Duct Tape, purple everything everywhere, smooching and running, Clint doesn't have an inside voice, Captain America Big Bang 2019 | cabigbang, Embedded images

Clint's just being a good landlord, repairing some completely accidental, not even his fault a little bit, he didn't TELL those robots to... Uh. Repairing some damage to Aimee's apartment, when he's banned from IKEA. Look, it could happen to anyone!

Lots of things happen to Clint that could happen to anyone. They just... don't.

So he does what anyone would do, if they were an elite secret agent in desperate need of stylish yet inexpensive furnishings: he breaks in to IKEA. He finds the shelving he needs. He also finds the Winter Soldier.

Record scratch whaaaaaat

Things... escalate quickly.

Clint can deal with danger. He can survive the gravad lax. He can escape the ball pit. He can dodge Natasha's disturbing Russian metaphors. But falling for the Winter Soldier?

Yeahhhh Clint's in over his head.

TL;DR: Clint finds Bucky living in an IKEA. For reasons. Idiots-to-lovers hijinks ensue.

Alternately: Clint came here to kick ass and assemble IKEA furniture, and he's allll out of Allen wrenches. Seriously, could someone assemble this furniture for him? Will pay in blow-jobs. Assassin experience an asset. Heh, asset. What, too soon?

Read on Ao3 | Art Embedded in fic | Art by Mystrana